Lost in Transition: The Weight of Expectations After West Point and Military Leadership

For veterans, the battle doesn’t always end with service; it continues in the struggle to find purpose, identity, and belonging in civilian life.

By R. T. Garner

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For 14 years, I’ve been fighting a battle I never expected: the struggle to find my place after leaving the military. I graduated from West Point, served my country, and earned three master’s degrees. On paper, it looks like I should be thriving. Yet here I am, stuck in a cycle of self-doubt, frustration, and a deep sense of failure.

In 2004, I stood among my peers at West Point, filled with pride and a sense of accomplishment. I had earned my place at one of the most rigorous institutions in the world, surrounded by leaders destined for greatness. Like many of my classmates, I envisioned a lifelong career in the Army, rising through the ranks, and eventually transitioning into a civilian leadership role that would capitalize on everything I had learned and accomplished.

But life has a way of veering off course. In 2010, I was medically retired from the Army, years before I had planned to leave. My career, my purpose, and my identity as a leader were suddenly taken away. The structured life I had built, with its clear goals and direction, vanished overnight. What…